Why I Abandoned My Search for Water-Based Lube

My first lubricant was a cheap 'n nasty tube of KY Jelly that I bought to facilitate the insertion of my kegel balls. At that stage, I was a bit uneducated and just thought that anything would do – even though I knew how susceptible I am to candida and yeast infections. Back in Ye Olden Days, I didn't know that checking ingredients was important. 

I also didn't know that there were different types of lubricant until I won a Bijoux  Indiscrets hamper, including a silicone-based one that was way fancier than me. I realised that the silicone provided a far thicker, more cushioney substrate that was way more comfortable than the thin glycerine base of the KY. At that stage my only insertable was the Pure Wand, and its steely heft definitely benefited from a long-lasting, extra-thick lubricant. By that point I'd realised the error of my ways – KY is pretty much the lowest-tier stuff you can get in terms of ingredient safety, and it was never meant for more than short-term functionality (I mean, it was manufactured purely for medical examinations, and you know how comfortable those are). For a while, I tried to find a water-based alternative that worked for me, but I was pretty limited by price and at that stage I didn't have any silicone internal toys that would react badly to the silicone in the lubricant.

Eventually, I was lucky enough to try out some coconut oil lubes from Organic Machine, and fell in love. Finally, a silicone-compatible alternative that is body-safe, doesn’t contain any nasty sugars, and mimics the thicker feeling that I love. The word “cushioney” is the only one that really describes it. A thicker lube makes me feel like there’s a protective layer providing a literal cushion between myself and the toy I’m using. This is awesome for something hard and unforgiving like the Pure Wand, which is basically a battering ram for your G-spot. I’m not sure if I am in love with the thicker consistency for the way it physically feels or the way it makes me feel in my head -- I have a history of terrible yeast infections that caused a lot of pain and micro-tears when I was younger, and the additional protection provided by thicker lubricants makes me feel more at ease, despite all that being behind me now. It’s also really long-lasting, compared to the water-based lubes I’ve tried, so you also feel like you’re using less than usual.

But hey, enough about how it feels. Is it safe to use? Generally, oil-based lubricants have a bad rap because they are more likely to clog pores – which, for the intimate area, sounds like the worst idea. They also are more likely to trap bacteria, leading to an increased likelihood of yeast and bacterial infections, unpleasant odour, and all-round nastiness. They are also not condom-friendly, as the oil degrades latex and makes it more likely to tear (this doesn’t apply to non-latex barriers though!). Sources like this one discourage the use of oil-based lubes for this reason, and I get it. I remember reading a magazine article that spoke about people using Vaseline, baby oil, even cooking oil (???) as substitutes for lube, and how damaging it was for the reasons above. But like. Guys. An unrefined coconut oil is vastly different from the vaguely chip-scented sunflower oil in your pantry, mostly because it can actually be used on the face and body without clogging pores. It’s also anti-bacterial, so should actually serve to combat any yeasty/bacterial nasties that other oils might foster.

I haven’t actively searched for sciencey studies that can confirm or deny this last claim, but I did find an article that has a gynaecologist arguing that the fears surrounding coconut oil seem to be mostly theoretical in nature, and that the gynae in question hasn’t yet seen anyone complain after using it. And that’s good enough for me. As someone who struggled with baaaad candida overgrowth in the past (you know it’s serious when it’s running through your entire digestive tract and changing your food cravings, whaddup), I haven’t noticed anything amiss after using it on a fairly regular basis.

Basically, I’ve given up my search for a decent water-based lubricant for now. Organic Machine’s Glide really works with my body’s preferences, but hey, it might not be the right for yours. Minerva disagreed with me almost point for point on this product – she didn’t enjoy the consistency or the moisturised residue it leaves afterwards, and, basically, she disliked everything I loved. The thinner, slicker texture of water-based lubricant works for her, so why change it up?

Personally, I’m a coconut oil convert now, and I still highly recommend Organic Machine’s Glide and Peak for those also looking to test out some really high-quality products handmade by a fabulous Joburg lady. But hey, if you’re already have a good coconut oil lying around you can experiment and see what works for you. It might be awesome.

Have you used oil-based lubricants before? How did that work out? I’m keen to hear some stories.