To kick off my first review of the new year, I'm starting with one of my favourite pieces and its little baby brother. It's a couple of gorgeous wooden paddles (NSFW links!) from the German manufacturer MEO who we've worked with before. Honestly, I love working with them because they are just so incredibly pleasant to deal with, efficient as all heck, and their products are the pinnacle of excellence. As always, these toys are provided free of charge by the company in exchange for an honest review.
So, first impressions. These paddles are 40 x 9cms and 26 x 8cms respectively. This makes the big one larger than any of the impact toys I have so far. The small one is about the size of the leather slapper we reviewed previously, and can fit into the back pocket of a pair of jeans with the little handle peeking out the top. Cute! Each of them feel really good in the hand -- solid, but light. Even though the big boi is so impressive in size, it's surprisingly easy to wield due to the choice of materials. The wood feels smooth and it smells faintly earthy, the handles fit easily into the palm, and each feature a slim leather loop for hanging. As is the minimalist MEO way, each toy comes in a simple plastic sleeve with the product tag attached to the loop. Nice.
Most striking was the actual appearance of the wood. Before this I had never heard of bubinga but loved the way it looked on the website -- the colouration is warm and the grain just looked beautiful. And yet I physically groaned when unboxing these beauties because the natural wood has such a subtlety of tone. The grain all but glows with a mica-like shimmer, and I get to own (and get hit by!) these objects. My butt is not worthy.
As an aside, a swift self-edification Google session revealed that bubinga is sometimes called "African rosewood" due to that rich, ruddy colour. It's an incredibly strong wood with exceptional surface hardness, which is why it's used for practical stuff like making woodshop tools and such. I was also delighted to learn that bubinga's density lends itself well to drum kits, especially for the heaviness and aggression required by metal drummers. Fun!
The Big Boi
I'm going to focus on the more imposing version of this paddle first, because this is my new ultimate fave in my impact arsenal. The large bubinga paddle provides the a thuddiness that I haven't felt from anything else just yet. Previously, my most impactful implement had been the French leather paddle, but that provided a comparatively lighter feel and sort of more of a surface hit. Conversely, the bubinga provides a much deeper hit that compresses tissue and ripples flesh with very little force. The weight-to-density ratio of the wood means that a wristy little flick of the paddle can deliver a solid and focused thud, accompanied by a very satisfying smacking sound. This combined with the size and balance of the toy makes you feel super powerful when you hold it. It's pretty great.Something that's important to discuss is the depth and penetration (heh) of the impact. For those not in the know, spanking on the butt (especially the underbutt) can feel good because it encourages blood to flow to that region. In people assigned female at birth, this is pretty close to the genitals, thus facilitating arousal. Additionally, the deep thuds literally "shake up" the area, providing a jostling sensation that feels wonderful and makes you want more. Pair this with some kegel balls and you are in for a great time.
However, due to the easy power this paddle provides, you do need to be careful about the placement of hits -- especially if you have a less than generous behind. My hips and booty are not heavily padded so a misplaced smack can land on what are colloquially referred to as "the butt bones." But let's give those pelvic protrusions their due and call them the ischium. Observe!
 |
| Source |
The Little Guy
I haven't used this baby nearly as often as the larger version just because I'm really feeling that expansive surface area the latter provides. However, I'm visually delighted by the tininess of this little guy. It's a perfect scaled-down version of the Large and feels much the same in terms of impact, just more focused. Due to the surface area available, it sort of feels like being spanked by hand. A very hard hand.
I quite like using it on smaller, more delicate areas as it is quite deft to wield. Going back to the issue of the ischium, you can actually avoid those little bony points by whacking around them in a fairly targeted fashion. The nimble nature of this tiny paddle also allows the user to round out a spanking session to ensure optimum coverage. For example, you can have a rousing session with the large version and, when it gets too sensitive to keep hitting those areas, you could take the smaller one to the unattended areas that require more nuance, like the sides of the butt that you need to be careful with due to the prominence of the femur heads (again, refer to the anatomy image above).I have a very scant butt, guys. You gotta be mindful.
The adorableness of this item fills my heart with delight and I love its literal pocket-sized transportability. If your life is more exciting than mine, you can slip this in a back pocket on the way to meet up with a partner or use it as a top-flagging tool at play parties. I also love imagining the comic relief provided by the visual contrast created by the two. Think of going to an experienced impact bottom and proudly presenting the little guy, allowing them a giggle, then pulling out the big boi and getting the reaction you want. Or even vice-versa! These hypotheticals fill me with glee.
--
All in all, each implement is wonderful to use and beautifully made. I highly recommend the Large bubinga paddle but get the small for the lols. Check out our other MEO reviews and follow them at the links below. Never forget that their online presence is NSFW so ensure you're on a private network with no minors to spy on you.
No comments:
Post a Comment