Review: Vibease Emerald

Tbh, I haven't really been in the mood for much physicality these days. However, the toy I've used most during lockdown has been the Vibease Emerald, a new one from their Jewel collection. It's cute! It's fun! And it's shiny. It more than makes up for the nice-idea-but-tragic-execution of their flagship model, the Vibease. I received this product in exchange for an honest review, and am so happy I did (not least because it's fun to photograph).

Ever since I tried the pronged shape of the Satisfyer Multifun I've been invested in forked vibrators. If only the Multifun had been a little more rumbly! The shape was so great because it almost directly mimics the shape of the internal clitoris, meaning that you really got to focus on the crura and bulbs of the clitoris. Great design! However, the buzzy vibes numbed me out more than anything. Bummer.

The Emerald has a similar "surround and stimulate" design plan, but more akin to the We-Vibe Gala. It's shaped kind of like a little chibi bunny with a faceted jewel-type design near the flattened base to visually reference the collection. However, the colour is more mint icecream than deep emerald, but it works! Secretly, I love pastels so this is a good fit for my aesthetics. Visually, I really like this toy. The shape sits neatly in the palm and forks around the clitoris to surround it on either side with its little silicone ears. And it feels great. 

Basic stats. The Emerald has three speeds and four patterns. It's rechargeable and body safe (as expected these days). The USB charger is one of those fun but slightly frightening ones that involve literally impaling the toy with a spear-shaped charging pin into the tiny little dimple in the silicone of the side of the toy. It always feels like I'm going to do it wrong and break it somehow, but all has been well so far. This little gap in the silicone means that the product is "water resistant" rather than waterproof. This means that you can clean it under a running tap and take it into the shower with you, but it shouldn't be submerged in a bath, for example.

The vibrations are really powerful, although on the buzzier side of things. I'm not even mad because this toy provides some entirely new stimulation for me. The flexible little ears fold around your anatomy to surround it with vibrations and it is glorious. The encompassing surface area and vibrational range really is pretty overwhelming, and it would probably be on the point of painful if this bad boi was just ABS plastic. Fortunately, the soft silicone moderates this slightly. This thing kicks it up.

Another notable feature is marketed as the toy's "mesmerising" light. A ring at the base of the toy changes colour with each setting and shifts gently between the colours when the toy is on standby. As someone who enjoys some rainbow action, I was delighted by this. The flat base of the Emerald also allows it to stand easily on flat surfaces without getting the pronged business end in contact with dusty of cat-hair surfaces. When it's on your bedside table, cheerily cycling through its colour spectrum, it looks like a minimalist bunny-shaped night-light for a kid's room. I kind of love it.

The only thing I don't love are the unintuitive controls. The toy only has one button (a great improvement to the app-controlled fiasco that was the Vibease), but somehow it still doesn't work? WHY. Is it me? Am I the problem? One time, I abandoned a masturbatory session because it took me too long to remember how to turn the toy on and I didn't feel like rummaging around for the instruction manual. While googling "Vibease Emerald" to link to the company website, I literally found this:

Am I just unable to reconcile my toy usage with these controls? It has to be more intuitive in reality than my experience, surely? Anyway, one long press turns it on and off and then you basically just mash the single button until vibrations happen. Mash it! Press it multiple times in desperation! Actually, just twice is fine. But still! It feels like I need to learn how to operate this device each time.

In use, the flexible silicone ears provide a fair amount of sensory customisation. You can squeeze them together to intensify the enfolding feeling or allow them to bend to the shape of your anatomy. Hold the toy ears up or down, flip it to the side; there's a lot of angles you can work. While the buzzy quality of the vibrations may be an issue for some, this evens out a little as you work your way up through the speeds.

I really enjoyed the Emerald! If you're out for an affordable vibe that provides intense and encompassing stimulation, this is your best buy. Bonus: cute bunny aesthetic and night-light potential. Check out Vibease at the links below:

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